How To Save a Life
by ForeverYours-x
Summary: Gabriella's mother had been sick for years, and she knew that the frail lady would never be completely healed. When her mother finally passes away, how will she cope and even more importantly; who will Gabriella turn to for help? TxG
1. Chapter 1

**How To Save A Life**

**Summary:**

Gabriella's mother had been sick for years, and she knew that the frail lady would never be completely healed. When her mother finally passes away, how will she cope and even more importantly; who will Gabriella turn to for help? TxG

**DISCLAIMER: **

I do not own High School Musical, nor am I affiliated with anyone whom may work for Disney or High School Musical. Troy, Gabriella and any other recognisable characters are credited to their rightful creators, and in no way do I intend to class them as my own creation.

**Authors note: **

So, I began this story when I finished Always, but I never got past the first 3 paragraphs. A couple of weeks ago, I opened up the document and felt compelled to finish it. It is inspired by the song 'How To Save a Life' by the Fray. This was originally a one shot. When I sent half of it over to be read I felt it was long enough for a chapter and if I was to add everything in, it'd be way too long. So I'm planning on making this a two shot but we'll see where it takes us. :) I dedicate this chapter to Liv, Tess & Liisa for their continuous help and support and pushing me to make this the best that it can be.

*bites nails hard* Please review, it means so much? Tamy. xo

* * *

**Chapter 1**

I knew my face was pale white; almost ghost-like, and the black circles under my vivid, deep brown orbs could be mistaken for that of a coal mine. My hair no longer felt silky, soft and shiny- instead it was dull, dry and lifeless; stuck to my head like a heavy black cloud. I hadn't slept for 72 hours straight, and I knew the sleeplessness would carry on until the inevitable happened. My name is Gabriella Montez and my mother had been sick with Pneumonia for 4 years prior to my 21st birthday – she was cruelly diagnosed on my 17th. I was not naive to the illness. I knew what the doctors were saying when my Mom asked me to leave the room. My mother wasn't going to last much longer, and the thought made me weak to the bone.

It had always been us two girls together, as my dad left before I was born which never really bothered me – until now, when I was faced with the prospect of being alone. Fortunately, I was 21 and so I was eligible for my own house if necessary, but I had already made preparations to stay with my friends when the time came. However, my friends were not always the most helpful of people. I wouldn't change them for the world but I couldn't help but wish that they would listen more. I needed someone to hold me close, to promise me that everything would be okay even though I knew it wouldn't be. I wanted someone to go through the motions with me whether they felt my pain or not. I longed for someone to tell me they understood just so that I could scream and shout and tell them that they would never understand my pain. I needed someone who cared and out of my friends none of them had it all in a package.

"Honey, maybe you should eat something" my mother Anna, suggested weakly to me.

"Mmm, soon" I replied distantly, only hearing the neediness and weakness in her voice as oppose to her suggestion and feeling helpless and broken as I contemplated the fact that there was nothing one could do for her, educated in medicine or not.

That was another thing that I could not seem to muster; eating. It wasn't that I was starving myself or deliberately causing my own pain, it was that I didn't feel in the slightest bit hungry. My mind was far too preoccupied with my mothers deteriorating health. I'd never been a sickly person; any normal person would be insanely grateful for that fact and usually I would be too but I would've done anything to trade places with my mother, for me to be the one to feel the pain of an illness that was never going to fade and only brought me closer to my death bed with every waking moment.

My phone rang loudly and I was grateful for the escape. I was beginning to feel dangerously depressed and hearing a familiar voice was the last resort to bring me out of it. I looked at the caller ID and smiled. It was my best friend, Chad Danforth. If anyone could help me unwind it was him.

"I... Um... I've gotta get that. You know, keep everyone posted?" I explained lamely, almost a little embarrassed that I couldn't string a coherent sentence together.

She nodded meekly, her eyes fluttering closed as she attempted to sleep for what seemed like the 12th time that day. I escaped through the doors and followed the patterned floor outside. I breathed in deeply, inhaling the cold air before re-calling Chad who had given up trying after 3 unsuccessful bids to get hold of me.

"Hello?" Chad answered into his phone.

"Hey Chad, it's me, Gabs" I said, trying to sound as enthusiastic as one could be in a situation much like my own.

"Hey Gabs! Why didn't you answer your phone when I rang a minute ago?" he asked, clearly confused by the matter. I had to give it to him, as he wasn't the smartest of the bunch but my patience was wearing thin and comments that could've been saved for a better time were not exactly appreciated.

"Chad, I was in a hospital. If I was to answer the phone, it could potentially bring down the whole electronics system, and I wouldn't want to be responsible for killing thousands by speaking to you" I snapped, only realising how harsh it sounded after the words had escaped my bitter mouth. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for, I'm just worried about her" I said remorsefully, hoping he'd understand.

"I know, Gabs. I'm sorry, it was a stupid thing to ask. How is she?" he asked, softly.

"The same as before. She's barely speaking, sleeping constantly. She told me to eat earlier and although I know I should, I just can't find it in me to do it" I confessed, ashamed of myself.

"Just try, Gabs. Do it for her. Look, you need to sleep tonight; get some food and water in you. I'm picking you up at 6:30 and you're coming to my house for the night. If she gets any worse I'll drive you back down no matter what the time may be, but you really need to come away from there for a while"

I sighed, I knew he was only trying to look after me yet somehow deep down in the back of my mind I felt angry with his demands. "I'll see you at half six, okay? Love you. Bye!"

I drew my chapped bottom lip between my pure white teeth and ran my fingers through my hair. I decided I would go and refresh myself with a bottle of ice cold water and snack on some fruit before making my way back up to the ward. I was lonely there, sat by her bed watching her health decline. It was unfair to have her suffer so much, it was almost unforgivable to let her die without any help and so I hated the doctors and surgeons. Although I knew they were trying hard, in my eyes they were not trying hard enough. They were trained to save lives but my mothers life wasn't being saved; instead her life was being taken cruelly by a disease that was not her fault and the nurses thought it was okay to blow it off as 'there's nothing we can do, I'm so sorry.' What they could not comprehend was that even though it would only effect their lives for a few minutes, the lives of the family and friends of that person would never be the same again and surely for that reason alone they should keep trying and pushing their knowledge to create a cure for my mothers strain? I wasn't only furious with the hospital though, I was distraught with myself that there was nothing I could do to make her feel better. She'd blessed me with life and I couldn't return the favour by giving her longer to live. I knew she didn't blame me but how could _I_ not blame myself? She was dependent on me and I was not strong even enough to provide comfort.

* * *

Chad came to pick me up as agreed at 6.30PM. There wasn't much of a conversation on the way back from the hospital as I was consumed with fear and after my outburst at him hours before, I believed Chad was rather hesitant to fire up a lengthy discussion.

As we pulled up outside his house he quirked his eyebrow and glanced at his watch. "Troy's home early!"

"Troy?" I questioned. I recalled Chad describing Troy to me before but the details had clearly brushed straight over my head.

"My house mate. He's a really nice guy; usually keeps himself to himself so you wont have to worry about any intrusion of privacy. He's a basketball player too!" he explained, enthusiastically.

I nodded my head softly, taking in the information and making sure this time it actually sunk in. Chad was a basketball fanatic working for a local school teaching children how to shoot hoops. I was proud of him- he was co-captain of the basketball team in high school and since then he'd built on his talents and really made something of himself.

We gathered my belongings from the car and made our way into the house. I was extra attentive as I walked through, taking note of my surroundings and trying to get the homely vibe going. I wasn't one for sleeping over at others' houses so this experience would be another one of my firsts- albeit unwillingly.

In the hallway there were a vary of different images, each one symbolic to Chad and the people he was with yet each one seemed to be basketball centered- typical Chad.

The most intriguing picture was one of Chad with another man, who looked around about the same age as Chad, Taylor and one of her girl friends. I assumed that the young man was Troy, his house mate and for a second I actually felt something more than my overcasting depression- an urge of curiosity. The man himself looked rather mysterious, like there was more to him than meets the eye and I felt compelled to learn more. The lady beside 'Troy' looked angelic and extremely timid in her body language- I assumed she'd be rather shy if I were to meet her in person.

The pictures had made me wonder whether I was ever going to meet Chad's other friends. He was a part of our friendship group and had been since preschool but I knew he had other loved ones who he turned to when we were failing to be there for him. Chad had also known Taylor since preschool, they'd began dating in Senior Year and had been together ever since. I admired them dearly for their strength and devotion towards each other despite the constant rumours that surrounded their relationship- to make the transition from high school sweethearts to having a cherished, loving relationship was never easy.

Chad took me into the kitchen next and I figured this was where the mess began. There were pots and pans at the side of the sink waiting to be washed and the table still had the mornings breakfast on. I suppose I could expect no less in a house full of men and if I knew Chad, whether his house mate was tidy or not didn't matter because he'd only find a way to make more mess.

"Pardon the clutter" he excused smoothly, stifling a laugh as he took in my expression.

I looked on, almost horrified at what was appearing before my eyes as I looked around the room.

"Oh, come on Gabs. There's two men in one house and you expected it to be neat and tidy? You've known me for long enough now for it to register with you that I don't live in a clean environment. I'd of thought you'd of expected nothing less" he said clearly amused by my appalled reaction.

I opened my mouth to retort but was interrupted by a clearing of the throat. Both Chad and I spun on our heels to see the same man from the picture standing there, smiling apprehensively. Chad chuckled lightly and placed a hand to my back guiding me towards the man.

"Gabi, this is Troy. Troy, Gabriella." he said, grinning happily as he watched myself and Troy shake hands and exchange pleasantries.

"Nice to finally meet you, Gabriella. I've heard a lot about you." he said, nodding towards Chad.

"Likewise, Troy." I said softly, contemplating whether it was actually a lie to say that since the previous descriptions of him had gone in one ear and out of the other.

They say you make your first impressions of a person within ten seconds of meeting them and I'd certainly made up my mind about Troy- he was just as Chad had labelled him earlier and I could easily recognise why Chad has agreed to sharing his house with Troy; however the lingering mysteriousness hadn't disappeared and in fact, had only grown stronger. He had a total cryptic aura about him that made me want to gain more knowledge about his past.

Chad politely informed Troy that he'd be sleeping on the sofa for the night and despite my protest I failed to persuade them both that I'd be fine there myself. Troy joined us on the rest of the tour around the house, which was both exciting yet disappointing since I wanted to take in the house and it's features, and I wanted to talk to Chad in more depth about everything. At least now I had the chance to engage in conversation with Troy about his likes and dislikes.

Troy's bedroom turned out to be the best room in the house and I was overjoyed that I'd be spending my night there. My favourite part about it was the scenic view- there were acres of land with farm animals on, right outside the window and a lake further down that met with the sky as far as I could see. I think Troy figured that he'd won brownie points from me since he had a sly smile on his face at the look of awe that graced my features.

"I chose this room for the view. It's beautiful, isn't it?" he asked, cheerfully.

"Yeah, it really is and to be honest, I'm really not surprised that Chad didn't think of choosing this room. I bet he went for the bigger room, right?' I said, turning towards Chad to receive the confirmation that what I said was indeed a fact. For the first time in months, I actually laughed. It was such a huge revelation and it took me a few moments to actually believe that it had happened. When I had finally gotten over the shock, I relished in the utter relief and the lightness that had overcome me.

As we went to see the garden, I let my mind ponder over the information and I made my full judgment on the situation. It was a good conclusion; I knew I was going to be happy here and I didn't have to worry about getting in the way; if the first of Chad's friends were so lovely, I couldn't wait to meet the rest.

* * *

The next morning I awoke to the rain slamming against the bedroom window. Just one look through the window showed me that it had been raining throughout the night. I always preferred autumn because of it's colourful nature, it was really beautiful, but the wind and rain that came with it this morning meant I couldn't even enjoy the view or the animals outside. I turned over in bed to look at the clock; 6.30AM. For an unknown reason I felt a pang of strength and hope in my heart that everything may actually be okay, alongside a boredom and yearning for work. My job was as motivational speaker, primarily in high schools but sometimes I'd branch out to actual events like talking to businesses, if necessary. I'd prepared an emotional, personal speech 2 weeks ago when I needed a release, a burst of emotion and I suddenly felt the urge to inspire people. Acting on impulse, I called work and told them that I wanted to come in. They were unsure at first about me actually presenting something due to the stress I had been under but I insisted stating I needed to get away from everything, including the hospital, and was assigned a high school near Chad's house.

As I walked up to the school, papers in hand, I sighed. Life was so much easier back in high school- the drama was difficult at times but it was nothing compared to the stress and pressure of the real world, having to actually take things seriously and be mature about situations where you just wished you could hide away, or turn to someone older and wiser for support. Nothing was ever as serious and you never had to think about family members dying.

Some of the teenagers stared at me as I walked into the gate, whispering and saying that they believed I was going to be the one speaking to them that day. I smiled at them and kept walking, my head held high. I had to be professional- this was my job and I was good at it. If I couldn't help my mother and keep her alive, I could at least try and help the next generation to keep the peace between them. This was not only a way that I could get my emotions out, but it was a way to change at least one person's life for the better.

I conversed with the teachers and explained a little about what I was going to be doing and then watched as the children walked in and sat down on the seats in the hall. When all were seated, the head of the school introduced me and gave them back ground information about what I was there for. In those minutes, I looked out at the audience and watched their reactions intently. It intrigued me to see the different people and how they took in the information; there were the ones who looked bored already, the ones who looked towards the 'God' of the school to see what he thought before copying, and there were the ones who were genuinely interested. The head teacher walked off the stage and I took a deep breath, composed myself and walked on to the stage.

"Hi, I'm Gabriella Montez." I stated, smiling widely.

"As Mr Gately has just explained I'm here to speak to you about life and love in general. While most of you will sit and roll your eyes finding this pointless- I can guarantee that you'll get something out of today whether it be now, or 10 years down the line so although I cannot force you to pay attention today, I can only hope you respect me enough to listen." My eyes landed on the guy most people kept glancing at as I forcefully punctuated that line and smirked mentally as he leaned forward indicating he was going to be attentive.

"Okay, lets get started. A few questions- how many of you have lost someone close to you?" I was surprised at the response to my question, when over half of the room raised their hands.

"Over half the room. Interesting. And how many of you have felt guilty over something you said to those people before you lost them?" Over 3 quarters of the people who raised their hands before, did so again.

"Well, me too. Losing people is never easy and it's something we all try to ignore and push aside as though it doesn't happen, but it does. Everybody here is old enough now, by law, to take responsibility for their actions and that means when you tell somebody something, you're old enough to know what you're saying. We all say things we don't mean, but if you're too stubborn to apologise how will the person ever know you didn't mean it? If you're too much of a coward to say 'I'm sorry, that was uncalled for and I didn't mean what I said' they'll never know and you'll always feel guilty for it. How many of you have heard of the phrase 'life's too short to argue?" This time, the whole room raised their hands.

"And how many of you actually depict what that means and take it on board?" Only a couple of people raised their hands and a few giggles escaped the people's mouths.

"Hmm. Well, all of you have read or watched Romeo and Juliet by now, right? Let's take that as an example. Two star crossed lovers who cannot be together because of their families ongoing feud. They actually killed themselves because their love was forbidden and when their families saw them dead, they were angry because they had been lied to, and they said that if Romeo and Juliet had been honest from the start they might of reconciled for their sake. How many people truthfully believe that? That despite Mercutio and Tibult dying, the family would put their rage for one another aside and let Romeo and Juliet be together? Even still, it was too late for them to make that decision because the damage had already been done! So what I say to each and every one of you is this: don't let it be too late. My proposal to you is this; make up with everyone you have differences with. Why? Because you never know what is around the corner and before you know it people are gone. They leave way too soon and you never know if they are aware that no matter what you said, you always loved them. Honestly, when a person enters your life, unless you are too young to remember- you never forget them. Even if the relationship is rocky, you're always going to have one fond memory and even though you can't forget the arguments, they're what makes your friendship special, because they've brought you to where you are today. They've made you the person you are. So ask yourself this question- are you mentally and emotionally strong enough to forgive or are you too cowardly and would rather act childishly, because living with a burden of regret is certainly not the way I want to live."

I gave them a few seconds to take it in and I was rather proud of the outcome- not one person looked like they were not taking it seriously. There were students smiling at one another, others deep in thought and some even close to tears. I took another deep breath and closed my speech.

"Thank you for listening, you've been amazing" I smiled as the entire student body came together in a roar of claps and I looked to the back of the room where the teachers were stood, tissues in hand, giggling softly. To my surprise, there stood Troy, clapping too in what looked like a basketball uniform. I furrowed my brow and as I made my way off stage, the deputy head teacher taking my place, I walked over to where he was.

"That was incredible" he complimented, clearly in awe.

"Thank you!" I blushed. "I never knew you worked here? I mean, Chad told me you were a basketball player but he never said you taught it"

"That's because he's jealous that our team kick his school's butt each season" he said, smirking.

I giggled at the competitiveness and looked back at the clock at the other end of the hall. "I... uh... I gotta go. It's getting late and I need to go and see my mother"

He nodded sympathetically and looked down at his phone. "How about we swap numbers? You know, to keep in touch and all" he suggested.

"That'd be great!" I smiled, genuinely happy that I'd made a friend out of Troy.

After we had swapped numbers, I made my way back to Chad's house and got changed into something more comfortable before grabbing my purse and phone and setting off again. As I caught sight of the hospital, the looming black cloud took it's place back over my head. I sighed; it was going to be a long day.

* * *

My mother was worse than expected and I felt guilty for actually enjoying my day and going work. I sat by her side the whole time and for once, she actually asked me to stay with her overnight.

"Gabriella?" She called out, her voice raspy.

"Yes?" I replied, placing my hand over her shaking one. She looked so tiny laying there and I felt all the more helpless knowing I couldn't revive her and give her the burst of life she needed.

"Will you stay with me tonight? I mean, you don't have to but..." I cut her off mid-sentence.

"Of course, you don't even have to ask" I smiled weakly. Shit. This scared me, greatly. It meant she was afraid of being alone. When the maths was done properly, it showed she felt worse and was worried for her health.

The nurse came in and wanted to run a few blood tests and change her drip, so I left the room and went to get a magazine to read as I predicted she'd be asleep for most of the time I was there.

To my surprise, she was awake for about an hour and we chatted about a thousand and one different things. The conversation was mainly carried by me but I understood that with her chest she couldn't do a great deal of talking without feeling discomfort. When she fell asleep, I got out my magazine and managed to take 15 minutes away from it all and just relax. The nurse then came in with a portable camp bed so I didn't have to sleep in a chair and I snuggled in, facing my mother and gradually drifted off to sleep.

The next day, I woke at 7:30AM due to the ward round. My sleep had been interrupted for most of the night again with emergency buttons being pressed, people arriving and others crying out. My mother seemed to be feeling brighter in the morning and even suggested I take the day out. At first I refused, but not only did she insist, I received a text from Troy.

_'I'm not working today. Is your mother feeling better? If so, do you want to get a smoothie from Starbucks? Troy' _

I smiled and turned to my mother who was half asleep. "I love you" I whispered softly, placing a kiss to her hand.

She mumbled a quiet "I love you too"

* * *

I met Troy at his house and, as a typical girl, made him wait 15 minutes while I got ready. When we were finally ready, Troy drove us in the opposite direction of the Starbucks I knew, but we still got to a Starbucks; a more reserved, quiet place with a country park across the way.

"Wow. It's beautiful! I didn't even know there was one around here!" I said, scanning the area briefly.

"It's a great place to come to think. Do you go to the one in the city?" he asked.

I nodded, still in awe. We walked in an glanced at the boards above the worker's heads, choosing what we wanted.

"What are you having?" I questioned.

"Strawberries and cream, you?"

I pulled a sickly face before replying "Chocolate and cream"

After an argument over which one of us was to pay, I gave in and let him pay. We decided instead of drinking in the car, we'd go and sit under a tree in the country park and get to know each other better.

"Red or Blue?" he asked.

"Red. Chips or chocolate?"

"Are you serious? How am I supposed to choose?! Erm, Chips!"

I giggled. "The more manly choice"

"Shut the fuck up" he joked, winking at me.

We were laying against a tree just relaxing and getting to know each other in a fun way, and for once in three weeks I found myself gaining a sense of comfort- from Troy. He got up and motioned for me to follow.

"Where are you going?" I asked.

"_We_ are going for a walk" he stated, pulling me up.

We ran through the leaves kicking them aside and racing down the path. Out of breath, chests heaving, we rested against the tree when my phone rang.

"Probably Chad" I assumed and didn't think to check the caller ID.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Hi, is this Miss Montez?" the voice on the end of the phone asked.

"Umm, yes?"

"It's Highmill hospital here. It's about your mother, Mrs Montez. She's just had a heart attack. The doctors have managed to stabilise her for now, but they don't think she's going to last long. I'm so sorry."

"I... uh... what?" I asked, tears brimming in my eyes. How could this be when she was so well this morning? It still hadn't registered with me and I froze in complete shock.

"I'm sorry" She repeated.

"C-can I come down and see her?" I asked, stifling a sob.

"Absolutely. But... Gabriella- make it quick" she said, slowly.

I pressed the end button without answering her, and as the tears flowed down my face I turned to Troy.

"Do you think you could get me to Highmill hospital like... now?"


	2. Chapter 2

**How To Save A Life**

**DISCLAIMER: **

I do not own High School Musical, nor am I affiliated with anyone whom may work for Disney or High School Musical. Troy, Gabriella and any other recognisable characters are credited to their rightful creators, and in no way to I intend to class them as my own creation.

**Authors note:**

I hope this is okay and lives up to your expectations as it is the very last chapter. Yes, I decided it was best to leave this as a two-shot. I was having a conversation with a very respectable author yesterday about angst being harder to write than fluff but I take it back. The fluff in this isn't fantastic but I tried my best and for that alone – review? *offers flowers* :)

Tamy. xo

* * *

**Summary:**

Gabriella's mother had been sick for years, and she knew that the frail lady would never be completely healed. When her mother finally passes away, how will she cope and even more importantly; who will Gabriella turn to for help?

**Chapter 2**

"I... um.. sure" he stuttered, a little taken aback with how fast things had happened.

"Thank you" I whispered, shaking slightly from the pain.

We walked even faster than we had previously ran to get to the car and my heart beat seemed to get faster with every second that went by as we raced to the hospital. I glanced sideways at Troy, more salty tears cascading down my cheeks, and realised he wasn't at all sure what was happening, but he was doing this for me and that meant a lot.

We pulled up at the hospital and I threw the door open, car still rolling, desperate to get to my mother.

She couldn't die. How would I live without her? She'd been my rock for so many years, she was there for me constantly... without her I was nothing, nobody. I needed her, and right at this moment in time she was the only thing I didn't have. She was what was missing from my life, a hole in my heart had formed. She promised me she wouldn't leave me if she thought I couldn't cope without her and I couldn't.

I crashed through the doors, unable to feel any physical pain. Heads turned upon my arrival and somewhere in the deep sea of people I was sure a nurse had tried to get my attention, however I was unable to turn around.

I ran a hundred steps, five floors to reach her and when I arrived the nurses stood, staring at me, emotion lacking in their faces. Did this mean...? No.

"No" I whispered, almost inaudibly.

The head nurse hesitantly took a step toward me, though I could barely see, my vision blurred by tears. I took a step back, hitting the wall and falling to the floor. I didn't want her near me. Some nurse she was, letting my mother die. She had tried, but not hard enough and she made me sick. How could she even look at me after such a great betrayal?

"Please, no!" I shouted somewhat louder than before. This couldn't be happening. The song in the background became more and more muffled and the only sounds I could hear were my shrill screams of despair and my heartbeat intertwined together to make a sound I'd never forget.

In the next minutes I struggled to keep sanity, pushing myself up using the wall as a prop. I walked limply back through the doors and upon hearing the door close with a booming slam I began to run. Pushing past a confused Troy who stood in my path, the song on the radio caught my attention.

_'So what if it hurts me? So what if I break down? So what if this world just throws me off the edge, my feet run out of ground' _it sang.

"GABRIELLA!?" I heard Troy's voice shout yet I did not turn back, I only ran further.

_'I gotta find my place, I wanna hear my sound, don't care about all the pain in front of me, I just wanna be... happy'_

"Gabriella?" the voice sounded closer now, softer.

I ground to a halt, resting my head against the wall, convulsing with my tears. Just as I began to slide down for the second time, Troy caught me and held me close to his chest. He seemed more clued up about the situation now and I assumed he'd been informed by the nurses.

_'So any turns that I can't see, like I'm a stranger on this road, but don't say victim' _

'Don't say anything' I whispered along with the song, and Troy obeyed. He didn't say anything. Not one word escaped his lips as he rubbed my back, attempting to comfort the inconsolable - heal the broken hearted - be the answer to my prayers.

I managed to calm down slightly, soothed by the sound of his heartbeat. Well enough to hold myself upright, as Chad bolted through the doors.

"I.." he started, but one look at my tear stained face silenced him.

He took over from Troy and I clung to him with dear life as he attempted to compose himself.

"Just cry" I said quietly. "Don't be strong for me, you loved her too"

He tried. He failed. With a strangled cry, the tears began to fall for him too. Troy stood still, clearly distressed by the sight of his house mate and new friend in such an emotional state, yet at some level he understood or at least possessed the characteristic to care enough to be still.

After 5 long minutes I brought myself together, even more so than before and decided I needed to take the next step. "I want to see her"

Chad's head snapped up instantly at the statement. "Gabi... I'm not sure that's the best idea right now" he said, attempting to drive me away from the idea.

"Let Brie see her"

I looked up, surprised that Troy had even spoken. Studying his features, I decided that he too was convinced it was the right idea. Chad opened his mouth to argue but after noting the expression on Troy's face, he closed it again. I shot Troy a thankful look and grabbed Chad's hand clutching at it like a child with their teddy.

Without speaking, the three of us took simultaneously too a deep breath before walking down the hall slowly. Chad opened the door and the nurses were more or less in the same place as they had been when I had my break down. I bit my lip and sent an apologetic look their way and one nod was all I needed to confirm I was forgiven.

I stood at the door of the room where she lay and the tears reappeared. I could do this. I reached for the handle shakily and opened the door. Gasping at the shock, my hand subconsciously found it's way to cover my mouth and the realisation hit me again. She was gone... No longer breathing... No longer living. She wasn't thinking about anything as her brain was not awake, she wasn't snoring as her heart was not beating.

Despite the pain I felt, seeing her laying there peacefully helped to reassure me. She looked as though she was happy, sleeping. She looked even tinier than before and I felt a great deal of responsibility take over me. I couldn't save her life now but I had to make her proud of me, while she gazed down from the stars. She'd be the prettiest, brightest star up there. I knew that no matter what choices I made she'd watch down on me with pride, but even still I knew I had to make the right choices. I wanted to be the girl that people looked at and said 'She really made her mother proud, despite losing her at such a crucial age.'

I turned to Chad and nodded- a signal that I was ready to go. I pressed a soft kiss against her cheek and even though I knew she was unable to hear me I spoke a few lingering words.

"I'll make you proud, I promise." I swore as if it was an oath.

And if I did nothing else for the rest of my life, I'd make that one promise my life long mission.

* * *

I agreed to stay at Chad's for one more night but after that I was determined to stay somewhere else, after all I didn't want to depress Troy any further and Chad needed to grieve for himself. There was only so far he could go before he broke and I didn't want to be the one to drive him off the edge.

That evening Chad and I reminisced about our childhood, focusing most on the day we first met. I was completely grateful that Troy gave us space for the entire evening, retiring to his bedroom and listening to music.

"Remember when we first met?" he asked.

"Like it was yesterday" I replied, smiling.

"It was your mother who introduced us, no?" he questioned.

"Mhm. I was crying because I didn't want to leave her and she went over to ask you if you would be my little buddy. You said yes and we've been inseparable since" I giggled slightly, recalling the event.

His head dropped slightly "I loved her even back then, from the first day I met her, the energy she possessed shone through. She was an amazing woman"

I nodded, the world beginning to blur as I went off into my own world. "So, so amazing" I mumbled in agreement.

We must have sat there in silence for an hour, the fire burning bright, sending bursts of heat our way. It was nice to just relax and I knew that I could scream and shout if I needed too and Chad would simply watch on in understanding. I glanced at the clock; 11PM. Without saying a word Chad stood up and walked towards the door.

"Night" he whispered, smiling softly as he exited the room.

"Night" I sighed. I was alone again. I'd come to the conclusion that being alone wasn't best for me as it only gave me more time to think and in my state, thinking could be dangerous.

I suddenly became cold, the hairs on my tiny arms standing still in the air. I shifted closer to the fire and the tears began again. I mentally chastised myself for being so weak yet I knew I just had to let it out. Healing was a long process that needed to be taken seriously and not even the coldest of people could [get over (find new word)] losing someone close without healing completely.

I wasn't alone for long though, as the door creaked opened an inch, revealing a hesitant Troy.

"Hot chocolate?" he asked, grinning.

I contemplated the idea, weighing the pros and cons. "Eh, okay then." I tried to seem as bright as possible but I knew that he would only purge it out of me.

He sat down next to me and surveyed my features before shifting positions.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, sincerely.

"Tired yet I can't...don't want to sleep" I said, biting my lip so hard it began to bleed.

He nodded again in understanding and looked directly into my eyes. "Talk to me" he demanded, gently.

"No, I'll only depress you and it's unnecessary." I argued.

"Gabriella" he started, defiance in his voice. "You need to talk to somebody. You know as well as I do that Chad cannot take the extent that you need to talk at because he's grieving himself. As much as I'm sure your mother was an amazing lady, I can deal with it because I didn't know her. So just go ahead." he said, his eyes sparkling.

"I... I suppose I should thank you for agreeing to listen to me then" I said, agreeing to tell him.

"No, no thanks needed. Just talk" he said, showing his pearly white teeth once again.

I began my counselling lesson by explaining a bit about my mother. "She was a journalist, the most amazing writer I'd ever come across- straight A's too. We were so close, told each other everything and I knew that I could trust her with my life. When I hit my teenage years I began a mass rebellion and so for a month I moved in with my great aunt. The first week was okay but then I started to treat her the way I had previously treated my mother, except the words I called her were despicable. She forgave me but I never forgave myself. It was the turning point for me, and I decided I wanted to inspire teenagers of that age to love with all their heart and so I became a motivational speaker." I mumbled.

Despite his prompts I couldn't go on talking about myself and so I changed the subject.

"I got my wish" I said, looking up at him.

"And what was that?" he asked, a concerned look gracing his face.

"When I was younger, I wished that if ever my mother was to die, my last words would be 'I love you'." I said, tears rolling freely down my face.

"So that's one thing to cling on to... She knew you loved her" he replied, his hand finding a place on my back and beginning to rub as it had back in the hospital.

"It doesn't heal the pain though. Our last full blown conversation was about Chad, this house and you" I explained.

"Me?" he asked, taken aback.

"Yes. I was telling her about the house and how my first impressions of you had been great and how I wished to meet Chad's other friends since you'd been so nice to me" I said, smiling.

_Flashback_

_'How was it then, staying at Chad's?' my mother asked, trying to instigate a conversation._

"_Good, I guess. Troy is a lovely guy so it wasn't awkward and I didn't feel out of place in the slightest" I explained._

"_Mhm. Great" she said, with the most enthusiasm she could muster._

_I sighed as I saw her wince from the pain in her chest- talking wasn't good for her right now, yet she wouldn't stop because deep down she knew that this would be one of our last conversations._

"_Explain more about this Troy then" she demanded, trying to smile but failing miserably and shifting to a more comfortable position instead._

"_Well I'm not totally clued up on him since we only met yesterday but he has the most amazing azure eyes- you'd love them! He's definitely more emotional than Chad as he went for the room with the best view as oppose to the bigger room which Chad chose" I said, giggling and gushing like a little girl._

_She lifted her head up and looked me directly in the eyes. Her eyes were shining like the stars and I felt a glint of hope. "He sounds amazing, Gabriella" she stated, a sort of knowing smile gracing her lips. _

_End Flashback_

"So I think she liked you" I said, giggling and choking as the tears mingled in.

"Well then she definitely wins brownie points from me. And you think my eyes are amazing, aye?' he asked, nudging me gently, teasing.

I giggled but did not respond, only reaching for my hot chocolate and sipping another 3 mouthfuls.

"I'm in the way here." I stated after a few moments.

"What, no?" he asked, hurried.

"Yes" I stated "Which is why tomorrow, I'm going to stay with an aunt of mine"

"No... Please?"

What started out as a demand turned into a beg and I found my insides melting at the vulnerable streak in his voice.

"I have to leave at some point you know!" I said, trying to push past the seriousness and make a joke out of it.

"But not yet. You don't even need to think about it and so lets talk about something else"

And the conversation never went back to me leaving for the two hours that we continued to talk for. I wasn't aware of the exact time we fell asleep, only that neither of us made it to bed. I awoke the next morning right by the fire where I had been sitting the night before, except the fire had been turned off and the house was silent which meant that Troy and Chad had gone to work.

* * *

Chad had agreed to take Taylor out that night and so she came over to Chad's house after work while he changed. It was incredible to finally speak to her again as it had been many years since we had sat down and engaged in a full blown heart-to-heart session.

As Chad and Taylor said their goodbyes and began to leave, Troy walked in, rather out of breath.

"Shit. My car has broke down on Kempsy close which is like a mile away. I've just ran the whole way" he panted heavily.

Chad laughed lightly and gave him a half sympathetic look before following Taylor out of the door.

As the door slammed Troy's head turned to sharply towards me with a desperate look on his face. How could I deny him help? And besides, I had nothing better to do. So I gave a big sigh as though I was actually bothered and smirked.

"What do I get if I come with you and rescue you from this complete disaster?" I asked.

"Ice-cream... on the way home" he pledged pleadingly.

"Buy me ice-cream and admit that I'm the best thing that ever happened to you and you'll have yourself a deal" I said smugly.

"Pfft, get outside!" he demanded jokingly, giving me a light shove.

"I think that we should have a race to Kempsy close, just to pass the time" I announced.

He looked at me, a glint of amusement in his eye. "You couldn't take it" he challenged.

"Never underestimate a girl" I retorted.

He raised his hand and did a silent count down from three to one and we set off. Giggles and squeals echoed through the air as we ran side by side down the pavement and it sounded as though two school children were playing tag. It seemed whenever I was around Troy, I felt free, almost like a child again and the feeling was something I found myself growing attached to- like my own personal drug.

"How much further?" I wheezed and he laughed.

"Half a mile"

"Are you serious?" I exclaimed rather loudly and he smirked when I looked around to see who was looking.

"Yes..." he coughed "...call it truce and we'll walk the rest of the way"

"Do I still get my ice-cream?" I asked.

"Of course" he said winking, and I almost swooned.

"Good. Because I'd have to shoot you if I didn't" I teased.

"Nah, no chance. You'd miss me too much!" he nudged me and chuckled.

I mumbled an expletive in reply and continued to walk down the street in perfect sync with Troy.

We arrived at the car ten minutes later and I sat inside while he called his insurance company to bail him out. After twenty minutes the car was up and running again and I was ready for my prize.

"When do I get my ice-cream?" I asked, pouting and giving him the puppy dog eyes.

"Soon" he mumbled, concentrating on driving.

I raised an eyebrow. "The grocery store is right there"

"How very observant of you!" he praised, teasingly.

"Trooooy, seriously, you promised" I whimpered.

"And I don't go back on my promises, you'll get your ice-cream, just not yet. All will be worth it in the end!" he stated.

"Fine" I mumbled, faking irritation with his cryptic talk.

His head immediately snapped towards me to make sure I wasn't seriously offended, so I reassured him with a gentle smile and he winked once again before focusing back on the road.

We sat in silence for the rest of the journey just enjoying each others presence. I took the few minutes that I had to my advantage and spent my time reassessing the emotions that ran wild in my brain. There were so many unanswered questions that my mothers impromptu death had cast to the very back of my mind and now they were being brought back to the surface.

I thought back to the flirtatious conversations myself and Troy had been engaging in and smiled. Up until the retched phone call that had left me broken, we'd been getting along swimmingly and I found myself questioning whether it was possible to like somebody that much within such a short space of time; thinking about that certain subject made my head spin.

I loved spending time with Troy, he made me forget about my life, the negative influences and helped me to relax and just be myself. But again, was it possible to fall for somebody in such a short space of time? Was I falling or just confusing my emotions at such a difficult time in my life? I sighed and rested my head back against the chair.

"Everything okay?" he questioned, his eyes sparkling like the stars above.

"Absolutely fabulous!" I giggled, more enthusiastically than I intended.

I felt the car ground to a halt and I forgot about the pending questions once again. Troy got out of the car and came around to the other side to help me out. I smiled softly at him. "BEN AND JERRIES!" I exclaimed.

He chuckled and grabbed my hand as we walked down the path.

"What flavour do you want then?" he grinned as we walked into the parlour.

"Mmm, this smells so good. Uh, I'll have two scoops of chocolate fudge brownie please" I blushed at my order and looked up at him as innocently as I could muster.

He turned towards the lady who was waiting to serve us and smiled at her. "Two scoops of chocolate fudge brownie and two scoops of cookie dough please, Melanie?"

"How predictable!" she teased him, before looking at me and smiling brightly. "Coming right up!" Clearly he came here often.

We spent half an hour in the ice-cream parlour, just giggling and chatting about nothing in particular. The conversations I had with Troy reminded me of the girl talks I used to have with my mother when I was younger and although he couldn't replace my mother in any way, it was almost as if he was my new source of happiness and there was something inside of me which urged me to tell him that.

"Umm, do you have somewhere to be straight after this or do you have some time on your hands?" I asked, coyly.

"Hmm, depends on what you want to do" he said jokingly before becoming more serious "Just kidding, I always have time for you! Where do you want to go?"

I smiled at him and blushed as I spoke "I would like to go back to the park across from Starbucks... if you don't mind. I uh, I know it's getting later but I want to tell you something and I believe that would be the best place to tell you"

He looked rather excited and I began to wonder whether he was actually aware of what I wanted to say to him but he merely nodded and looked down at his empty ice-cream tub.

I bit my lip and giggled but refused to make eye contact with him out of pure nervousness.

He ran his hand through his hair and and looked at his phone to check the time. "Are you ready to go then?"

"Yeah, lets go" I smiled.

He grabbed my hand once again and this time I was extra attentive to the feeling that rose from the very tips of my fingers all the way to the top of my head, leaving it spinning in a million circles. My mind was made up and the questions were answered.

* * *

We arrived at the park just as most people were leaving which pleased me greatly. The less people, the easier I'd find this. We found a nice spot under a tree and I sat down, pressing my back against the cold bark of the tree.

"So, you wanted to speak to me?" he asked, tentatively.

"Yes." I took a deep breath. "But it could last a while, so if you get bored, just shout at me to shut up" I said with a giggle.

"I'm all ears" he stated, pulling his ears out slightly to make a joke out of the situation.

"Okay. Well firstly I want to thank you; ever since...she died, you've been there for me constantly, doing everything right without me even having to ask. But when I did ask, you didn't speak a word, you just held me; when I needed to get things out, you listened and more importantly you helped me to forget everything that happened purely by laughing." I paused for a second so that he could take it in. "I know we haven't known each other for all that long but there's just something about you that makes me feel free and happy. The first time I saw your picture in the hallway I felt intrigued to learn more about you and now that I do I've learned to love you for who you are. I still don't know everything about you but I know that I want to find out as time goes by... I want to know everything about you and your life. I just..."

He cut my off with a simple answer; "Shut up" and I started to feel dread form in the pits of my stomach. "I want to speak" he said said, his azure eyes sparkling and his lips smirking in amusement. "Firstly, you've nothing to be thankful for, I was there for you because I wanted to be, and because honestly I couldn't bear the thought of you feeling so helpless and small. Secondly, love is a strong word. I don't know if what I feel for you, what we feel for each other, is the equivalent to that but what I do know is that I love being in your company. You make me happy and truthfully, that is all that matters."

I sighed in relief and the nervousness that had once settled in my stomach disappeared only to be replaced by an overwhelming amount of happiness- more than anything that I had ever felt before.

He tugged at my hand and when he had freed it from it's position he pulled it into his lap and intertwined it with his own. No more words were spoken for the next five minutes for nothing more was needed to be said. We made each other happy and that was all that mattered.

* * *

I took a deep breath and made my way onto the stage. It had been 3 months since my mother had passed away and since then my life had changed dramatically- I'd been on a roller-coaster of emotions and I was finally starting to settle down into life again. This time I wasn't living in fear of losing someone nor was I feeling alone, I felt complete and full of joy. I glanced to the back of the room where Troy stood and my lips moulded into a smile as I saw him point to me and share with his colleagues that I was his. Nobody else's. Just his.

I cleared my throat and began my speech. "The last time I came to this school, I delivered a speech on losing people; I wanted you to reconsider the things you said to people so that you didn't live with regrets. Well this time I want to talk to you about happiness. Where do you think your source of happiness comes from? Your mother or father, brother or sister? Maybe even chocolate or chips! Either way, if I've learned nothing else in life, I've learned that happiness comes in many forms and it can change your life for the best. Your happiness determines the way you act, the way you live and who you are as a person. So I ask you to reassess how happy you feel and why you feel that way, and also how you make others feel because your behaviour effects the way others see you. My source of happiness was my mother when I was your age, she was everything to me; still is but I've learned that the feeling of happiness she gave me can be replicated through others; people who make you see the world through different eyes, people who brighten your world and give you a reason to wake up in the morning. I say this; smile every once in a while and you'll soon see the difference."

I closed my speech with a slogan and looked towards the head teacher to indicate that I had finished and grinned as the room echoed with claps and cheers. I slipped past the head teacher and made my way to the back of the room as I had done all those months before and I felt as though I was dreaming- except this time, everything was different. Instead of getting all embarrassed and tongue tied, I wrapped my arms around Troy's waist and nuzzled his neck. "That was for you" I mumbled sweetly against his ear.

"It was?" he asked, surprised.

"Yeah. For more reasons than one- you've made me happy and you've shown me something more valuable than any degree could ever teach me. You've taught me how to save a life." I stated.

"How to save a life?" he repeated.

"Yes. You showed me that even though I couldn't save my mother, you could save me. You waltzed into my life at the most crucial time, and blew me away with your manners and whole aura." I said, kissing just below his ear.

He smiled widely against my skin. "I love you" he responded and I closed my eyes.

"I love you too, Troy" I said and the moment held such a significance; if he had never of given me his number, we would've never of met up and I would never of fallen for him. We let go of one another and gathered our belongings before turning our backs on the school, hand in hand and walking straight into the horizon, where I knew my mother looked down on us, anticipating our new lives together and living in the hope that all would turn out just the way we wanted it to.


End file.
